Find the Spark Within
Illuminating discussions focused on finding your next chapter through healing & thriving
FSW 1 Kellie Burns | Optimal Wellbeing
Find the Spark Within
Unlocking The Optimal Wellbeing Within You

By embracing the ups and downs of real life, you discover that the keys to happiness, joy, and optimal wellbeing are found in knowing and loving yourself. There’s no better change you can experience than by letting your inner energies reveal your most meaningful goals. In this inaugural episode, join Christin Collins and Kellie Burns as they explore the foundational takeaways from Christin’s recently published book, Her Phoenix Rising. Revising the root cause and allowing ourselves to feel all of the varied emotions that come with life, we learn to embrace, heal, and let go. All of the answers we are looking for outside of ourselves are already within. Enjoy this lively visit into these insights, and many more!

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Unlocking The Optimal Wellbeing Within You

Fireside Chat With Christin Collins & Kellie Burns

The experience that we’re all having through COVID has been an interesting time where we’ve all been contemplating some deeper questions. I find the timing of all this incredibly ironic and I’m very thankful that I had the opportunity to reflect and reset.

To me, this is a reset. I question what I am doing in my life and you were such an inspiration. There were so many moments in here where you could have gone down a different path and you chose to go straight ahead even when it wasn’t easy.

Especially when it’s not easy. You gave me chills everywhere.

Our generation, women, we think we have to do the right thing, we always have to be proper, smile, say yes and not sometimes ask the tough questions and question our community, our employers and ourselves about what we could be doing better. Talk to me about when the moment first came when you said, “I need to put this all on paper.”

I wish there was a single moment I could cite but to be honest, there had been moments that were subconscious like, “This is crazy and nobody would even believe this.” That would be an interesting story to share. As the book opens, it was a fateful evening in Florida with my amazing husband and my beautiful stepdaughter. We were sitting out back in our lanai, reflecting on a long, interesting day and yet overcoming something. Honestly, I don’t even remember what that actual something was but my stepdaughter has been impactful. It was one of those moments where her little blue eyes looked at me and said, “You should write a book and share these stories. Your life looks so simple, easy, glamorous and fun but people have no idea what you’ve had to overcome and you’ve overcome a lot. If you share those stories, you would aspire a lot of others.” I was like, “Here we go.”

On the outside, you look like you live in that beautiful community, you have a wonderful job and a wonderful husband, who writes a book about bank or hospital executives, best neighborhood. You checked all the boxes and you stepped away from it all.

I did have all those things. My life’s amazing but at the same time, there are some real things to overcome. The writing of the book for me was my personal exploration and journey and downloading it, healing from it and releasing. By sharing it, maybe it would help and inspire awakening in others. It is for anyone to realize, “It’s okay that it’s awful and my marriage is rough.” If we own how we’re feeling and we talk about it honestly, openly and lovingly, we can work through it.

Rather than turning to food and alcohol. I love the connection between mental health and your body because if you were so stressed, your body was failing you too. Talk about that.

The irony of the fact is that I found myself as a vegan triathlete hospital executive. I felt fine, I looked okay, life is rocking and rolling, I’m doing a triathlon. That very fateful day when Dr. Sal did blood work on me and my inflammation marker was so inflamed that it was almost off the page. That was the a-ha moment where I’m like, “What am I doing wrong? This is my professional job, I have oversight of wellbeing. I’m a vegan triathlete but I’m a mess on paper.” That was the a-ha of I’ve got to figure out my body is failing and in the state of inflammation, diseases created. What is it that I’m doing wrong? That was the beginning of this great exploration, internalization, asking a lot of questions and going outside of the box to find solutions.

You found a guru to help you through it all.

Mr. Kashman. He has been one of the most impactful humans in my life and the servant leader who inspired my awakening when he was my boss, with his form of leadership. The thing with Scott is that he asked inquisitive questions. He has a psych background. Instead of telling you, he held space for you to self-discover. I grew so much in those years when I was working with him and still to this day, he’s a very dear friend and a huge impact on my life.

I found it interesting you make a connection between two things on your health with what you put in your mouth and how you feel in your head. I don’t think a lot of people think that “What if I have some French fries, Twinkie or whatever.”

What’s happened for me is I had to will my way through decisions on eating for most of my life. Now because I’ve gotten in touch with who I am and I’m here now, I’m okay with me and I have self-love and self-care, now, when I’m eating a French fry, I am loving every second of it. I’m enjoying the moment, I’m taking it in but I’m not trying to find happiness and joy or I’m not subconsciously trying to self-destruct.

Mindless eating, which is what I find myself doing when I’m making my kids’ meals. I don’t sit down for a meal. I’m standing there and I put bites in my mouth without even thinking. It’s being mindful about what you’re eating.

Always put 100% to your goals and be unattached to what the outcome may be.

The decisions are easier because my portion control is better, I’m able to be like, “That was great,” but I’m in touch with my body and it’s saying to me, “You need some broccoli.”

It doesn’t taste as good anymore all of a sudden. You don’t have the cravings.

The cravings you are having are interesting when you’re like, “I am excited to have a salad.” I used to have a salad because I knew that was the right thing to do but now it’s like, “My body’s craving that for fuel.”

We have the connection about what you put in your mouth but what about what’s going on in your head, sleep, stress, all that and the effect on your body? Many people are like, “It’s not a big deal. I can handle it.”

You want to talk about what you eat and what your body is looking and feeling, look at your stress levels. What’s so interesting in part of this journey has been the self-discovery of the interconnectedness of all of those components. We were talking before about the chapter where I highlight that when Scott Kashman and I were bickering, as we do often. Conflict is amazing.

If you don’t argue in your marriage, you’re not doing marriage right. I learned that here.

Let’s go there because that’s such a hot takeaway. I was like, “That’s what marriage is.” It’s not about putting your sneakers on when it gets tough. The interconnectivity when you are so freaking out about what everyone else is doing. Judging, trying to control your environment and spinning because somebody else said, “I didn’t like your dress.” You’re stressed out at work, you hate your job, you have to address that and whatever your stressors are. How can you sleep when you’re stressed? How do we manage that? How do we let that go? You’re mindlessly eating because you’re exhausted, you’re stressed out. We’ve all been eating during COVID, stress eating or drinking.

Turning to that to feel better or because you’re bored. What about marriage? I know this isn’t a book about marriage but there are so many themes throughout especially the credit card part. Can you tell that story?

That was so awful and hard.

You told it and many of us could relate to that, the conflicts in marriage about money.

I had given my word and, David, you are so generous always. The grace that was shown to me in that experience, that’s what taught me honesty. Even when it’s awful, you totally screwed up and he had every right to be like, “That was a deal-breaker. You had promised and this isn’t the first time.”

To explain, David was looking through the finances and going to refinance something and the smart banker that he is had calmly called and said, “There must be some mistake here. I have $35,000 in credit card debt.

I was like, “I do.”

You had been stressing about keeping that from him.

FSW 1 Kellie Burns | Optimal Wellbeing

Optimal Wellbeing: Address your stressors as soon as you can so you can have a good night’s sleep.

After it came out, I was relieved and scared out of my mind knowing that night, when I was driving home that there’s a very strong chance that he’s like, “That’s too late. I’ve been there, done that. It’s not going to be able to be something that we can sustain.” I 100% underestimated him. I underestimated the strength of our marriage, myself and honesty. That’s one of those where I found such a good lesson in honesty and the freedom that honesty gives and letting the cards fall where they may. The best thing about that was the love and gratitude I felt from how that was handled. David’s handled the credit card ever since. We’re doing great.

That is a moment in your marriage, like a strengthening moment. It could have been awful.

It’s one of the hardest moments of our marriage.

It taught you to be honest, to reconnect and to trust him with everything. Trust is something so many of us have troubled with.

That goes into the unattached outcome, honesty and trust. I did that and I completely screwed up. I’m like, “Why should I do that? How did I get here?” I wasn’t fending for my marriage, it gave me that space to be able to reflect and be like, “How did I get here again. Why?” I realized I am trying to obtain some happiness through material things. I’m sure most of you can relate to this. It’s like that cortisol release. I’m like, “I love these shoes.”

During COVID, you could sit at home and shop.

When the box comes, I’m like, “Do I love it?” That happiness isn’t coming from that, it’s coming from here. It’s just a beautiful pair of shoes that I love and enjoy thoroughly but that’s not where I’m finding the satiation. That’s not where the dopamine hit is coming from.

What did you talk about, unattached outcome? What does that mean?

That has been such a huge lesson. It was a great experience with my friend and executive coach, Heather Christie, she’s so amazing. She was able to walk me through that. I used to only put myself out there halfway like, “Whatever, I’m not attached to the outcome. If it happens, it happens. If it doesn’t, it doesn’t.” This law-saver attitude protected me from being disappointed if and when there was a failure and that worked for me forever but it also kept me from giving an opportunity my all. Fortunately, sometimes that worked out, sometimes it didn’t but often it worked out. A lot of us do that. She was asking me a question about an upcoming opportunity. I’m like, “If it happens, it happens.” She goes, “On a scale from 1 to 10, where are you at with that?” I’m like, “Five.” It is what it is. She was the one who expressed to me, “You have to put yourself 100% into it, put it all out there and be unattached to the outcome.”

Attached to the goal but unattached to the outcome.

Laser-focused on the vision, “I’m going to go for it. I’ll give it my all and if that didn’t work out, that’s okay. It’s for a reason.” It’s so scary in the beginning until you have the experience where you did give it your all and you had a massive failure whether it didn’t work out or it did work out and it failed. That happens. It still happens to me now wherein last year, I’ve put myself all out there and it happened. All of a sudden, a few months later, it’s not anymore, so now I’m 100% vulnerable.

You’re not crushed?

No, now I’m like, “That’s interesting.”

You tried 100% and that’s the goal.

Every person on this planet has a slight degree of difference in the truth.

It wasn’t meant to be. I would love to also share that because this has happened. Since I’ve had some of these epiphanies where I’ve put it out there, going for it 100%, I’m attached to the outcome, it happened then it fell apart. It hurts. I have to talk myself through, feel that, sit in that, own that and be like, “Ouch.” Let me distract from that. Let me go on Bloomies and disassociate.

I’m not even going to think about it. That’s something I tend to do. I’m like, “I’m going to put this over here,” but it comes out in other ways later.

All kinds of interesting ways. Sitting there feeling that emotion in real-time because that emotion is a gift. We are, as a society and a culture, the ones that say we put the labels on the emotions but we’re going to feel all the emotions at some given time.

Good, bad. “This is okay to feel, this isn’t.”

We’re assigning the attachment of whether that’s good or bad. I had a great conversation with my cousin and we were talking about the economy. I had shared some of this information in the past and she said, “That was impactful for me.” The messaging came through as different people are going to look at this current economy differently. For a lot of people, it’s horrible. That’s the label they’re putting on it. For someone like me, it was a new opportunity. For some of my dearest friends who are in construction and my husband who’s a mortgage banker, they’re so busy they can’t breathe.

Service industry. Horrible. Everybody’s experience is so different. What part of the country do you live in? Florida has been very different than the Northeast or the West Coast. The pandemic has taught us all a little bit, I’ve spent more time with my family, fewer Saturday nights in the ballroom and hotel and asking people for money for different fundraisers. When people are giving money to be generous which they would do anyway, they don’t need to put on the gown and go to the event and spend ridiculous amounts of money to do it. It’s just supporting their passions.

I would love to touch in on charity and giving because that was another giant lesson in this book and our friendship is based on all of the work that we’ve done together in this community. It feels amazing.

After your success at the Wine Fest in raising a record amount of money, that was huge. I remember that morning. I don’t know how you were up after what you’ve done, that morning emailing, being like, “I can’t believe that happened.”

This is important, I don’t know if it will resonate with some people. It’s interesting is that some assume that you do that because you want recognition or attention. Maybe for some folks that’s what it was. That was not what it was for me at all. I was not there to try to please anybody else. Do you know who I was there to try to please? Me.

You and Deb, who you became such close friends with. I felt like you were wanting not to disappoint each other because you loved each other so much.

Yet, I wasn’t doing that to impress her but this is what I found out. It was deep. I chose to give so much of my energy, my love and my passion so that I could be comfortable and love myself. Let’s digest that for a hot second. I couldn’t just sit here and take in oxygen and be like, “I’m worthy of my own love.” I didn’t need it to feed you, my husband, my friends or my co-chairs. I found that in order to love myself, I needed to be serving. Simultaneously, I wouldn’t allow any receiving even if you were giving me beautiful, generous, whatever it was. The wall was so high that I wouldn’t have land because maybe someday you could take that away from me.

You are good at deflecting anybody because I remember seeing you, “You did such a great job. It was this.” It was never taking like, “I’m proud of myself.”

What are you proud of? I would get proud for a hot second in that moment of, “We did that. I did that. That happened.” That was my joy of self but that would go away and it was back to me and I was not in touch with who I was. I was not comfortable in my own skin. I hadn’t done the work to heal and be well.

How do you make that? For somebody reading, if somebody is sitting at home because there are so many moments in here when I’ve questioned my journey and said, “Where’s my path? What’s next? How can I be the light, be love, be a better person?”

FSW 1 Kellie Burns | Optimal Wellbeing

Optimal Wellbeing: Everyone has a different purpose and reason for being here. Get in touch with who you really are and what you are comfortable doing.

I remember when Heather Christie was interviewing me on her podcast, she asked me a similar question and my answer was embarrassingly simple. She was adorable because she rushed in to be like, “I know that everyone’s thinking it’s got to be harder than that. Your narrow mindset.” I was like, “Whatever. We can talk about this any way we want but here’s the answer.” It was almost a four-year period of a major shift, contemplation, sitting, being and discomfort. My example is extreme and I’m hoping that through sharing some of this, I help facilitate and expedite other people’s journey, that’s something I love about our friend. She’s hilarious because she’ll go, “I watched you and four minutes later, I’m understanding what it is for me.” I’m like, “Good. That’s leave that up for you because that took me two years.”

That’s what I got out of this. That was the quote, “I inspire awakening.” If you were asked what your goal is in life or who you are, “I inspire awakening. I inspire wealth.” It’s awakening for whoever you are to have people come out from within.

Also, what is your awakening, which for every single human on this planet, we have a different purpose and reason for being here? Getting in touch with who you are and what you are and being comfortable with the fact that even though Kellie’s a soul sister, we both are blonde and we both love to chat, we have differences. I honor and respect where you’re different from me, I’m different from her and he’d be different from him. Can you imagine a community, a culture, a globe that we were all centered and whole and we felt good being us?

And also respected people for being them. We hear all this fake news and media bias. I look around our newsroom and I see hardworking people doing their jobs from 26-year-olds to older people like me. We’re all biased but it’s where we grew up, it’s who we’re married to, it’s our experiences in life but it doesn’t mean we’re robots. We all have a bias and everybody’s experience is different. We could look at that camera right there and you say it’s gray and I say it’s black.

That was another lesson in this journey. It was another a-ha when I found out  — again through Heather Christie — there’s more. There are two in there but Heather Christie, I don’t get to be with a lot and when I am, I can’t wait for this experience because I learned so much from her. The experience was uncomfortable because my husband and I were not seeing eye to eye on something and I traditionally would get uncomfortable with that. I would want to put on my little sneakers and remove myself so I could feel safe. He was patient with me because he knew I would withdraw, that was our pattern for a long time. We were at an uncomfortable point and he’s probably waiting for me to remove myself so I can breathe and not hyperventilate.

Heather helped me understand that for every different person on this planet, there is going to be at least a slight degree of difference in the truth. How do we argue? We take turns listening to one another, we agree to disagree and we respect that everybody is entitled to their own opinion. As a society, can you imagine if we got curious about somebody else’s differences and ask questions? I enjoy that now when I disagree with someone, “I don’t agree with that.” I’m like, “Interesting.”

Tell me your perspective. Tell me why you think that way.

Maybe there’s a takeaway where I’m like, “Let me contemplate that. I’m going to assimilate that. I’m never going there.”

That’s okay, you listened. You thought about it and decided that that was not where you wanted to go. I love how you talk about the Wellness Wheel that you created. We should all sit down with a piece of paper sometime and chart that out for each one of us because it’s not just going to the doctor, there are so many different aspects of what makes you a healthy person.

When I found out that I was responsible for my own health, I was one of those people that was like, “I go to the doctor, they would tell me what to do. If they wrote me a script, I would take it.” I’m not going to be like, “What’s up for and why? Is there a way I cannot?” I was like, “The doctor said. They’re the expert, I’m going to proceed.”

You never question the doctor. That’s how we were raised, authority.

That wasn’t just a doctor, for me, that’s in any industry.

You found two incredible doctors.

Between Dr. Sal and Dr. Taschner, they were pivotal in my journey and very patient. The three of us along with others that we worked together, we self-discovered together.

Even in the worst situation, try to find joy and learn from it.

I love the part that you were trying to understand this complicated medical journal because I’ve done that, too, “I’m going to try to learn this.” Instead of saying, “This is not me, I need to go to someone who can translate this to me.” That’s what you did. Instead of saying, “I give up.

If anybody reads The China Study by T. Colin Campbell, they’re like, “Christin, that’s not that hard,” and I would be like, “I’m sorry.” I had no concept of this information. I did not know I was responsible for my own health and I jumped to The China Study, it didn’t work for me. In hindsight, I was able to find something that was simpler, to start digesting and understanding that. To bring that to the Wellness Wheel, I love that we would highlight six components of wellbeing so that wherever you were in your walk whether you came to the awareness that you were responsible for your own health and that you were interested in improving that, that you found, “That’s on me. That’s not on my doctor’s appointment.” The vast majority of chronic disease is preventable or reversible. There are genetics scenarios and things that cannot be changed but the vast majority of chronic diseases can be prevented or reversed. I’m like, “Why are we not all studying this? Why are we waiting until people get sick and then we’re fixing them? Why don’t we get to the root cause of why they’re sick if this is preventable or reversible?”

However you enter the Wheel, which would have been through nutrition, physical activity, sleep, stress, mental and behavioral health (which we work so much on and the sixth component), which is purpose or know your why. What was so interesting back then in that with Mr. Scott Kashman was when your why your purpose came out, he’s being the therapist. He’s like, “Can you say that again?” I’m like, “Huh?” When it flowed out again, it was an incredible experience because what it taught me was intuitively, I had the tools. Intuitively I knew the answers but I wasn’t living them. I wasn’t aware.

You’re speaking them but not living them.

When that came out and I was like, “That was so obvious. Why am I not living this?” What I love about that is that you don’t have to start by concentrating on eating vegetables. Vegetables are fabulous and everybody should be eating vegetables but you don’t have to wheel your way into your well-being. You can find that spark and awakening within you, however. Whether it’s through your divine purpose, your why and your reason for being, that could be your entrance. You start finding joy because you figured that out then you naturally start eating better. Where that frees up, “My sleep is not good, let me assess that. Do I have an optimal space to sleep in?”

“Do I have four glasses of wine before I go to sleep?” Which is not going to help you to sleep.

“Do I have a television in my bedroom? Do I go like this on my screen and think I can shut it off?”

Several years ago, my mom took my father to the doctor and he was pre-diabetic and they said, “You’re going to have to go on medication.” My mom said, “Let’s try this at home.” She went home and she did the lentil meatloaf and the vegan, it changed his whole life. He’d like cereal, yogurt, ice cream and everything with a lot of sugar. Six months later, he went back and the doctor said, “I have never seen a change like this.” It was pure food which she allowed him to eat. He had the flu in 2020 and she went to Walmart to fill his prescription. He had not had one prescription filled in 25 years since they moved here.

I love that you had that family experience. We would hear literally multiple times a day story after story about this not seven years later or seven months later. That was inspiring. I applaud and celebrate and thank the amazing people who are working on lifestyle and functional medicine. I applaud and thank the people who are making the mind-body connection because if you’re not settled, centered, whole and caring for yourself because you love yourself first, these other components are hard.

I love how you went to a card reader. You were opening yourself up to everything. Hypnotherapist, a medium.

I’m such a firm believer. I love saying yes to the universe. I’m like, “That’s so interesting.” I don’t even know what that’s about but it’s here for some reason. I saw Stephanie yesterday and she was adorable because she had no idea.

Stephanie Davis, the Downtown Diva who wrote a column about going to see GiGi, this medium. You spontaneously made an appointment then forgot about it. Six months later you look, “I have an appointment.”

I liked that adventure of, “I don’t know, this is here. Let me go ahead and try it.”

In other words, you’re not closing your mind off to any possibility.

FSW 1 Kellie Burns | Optimal Wellbeing

Optimal Wellbeing: If you’re not settled, centered, and whole, dealing with other components of life can be hard. Therefore, you must love yourself first.

Also, not stepping into obscene danger. I’m not an adventurer but I find curiosity, “That’s funny. I don’t even know what this is about.” As I shared it in the book, I woke up that day and it was a very busy week and there was this thing on my calendar and I was like, “I don’t know what this is.” I remembered. I was like, “I can’t go to that, I’m so busy,” and then I’m like, “I’m going to take this hour for myself. I’m going to go do this.” The experience that I had literally, was one of the pivots in my journey where I wasn’t looking for intel, I just went to this medium because my friend Stephanie wrote about it. Many other people started to go because of Steph’s column and I was like, “I got to go check this out.” I share some of that experience in the book. I was stoic. I was like, “No one’s getting in here. I’m not going to give away the stuff. If you Google search, I’m 100% sure you can’t find this stuff she started to share.

That was a heavy opportunity to start being curious like, “What’s that about? Is that an energetic thing? Is that a metaphysics thing? How is she getting this from me? Where is this coming from?” Maybe the next time we do this, we’ll bring in an expert. That’s where I want to go because I’m curious about energy and how we’re all one. We’re all this big, massive energy. We’re at a table with a microphone and you have that pretty dress on but we’re all just energy. There have been incredibly brilliant people who were able to articulate that. For me, the curiosity about our interconnectedness is what I would like to understand better. If I’m hurting you or you’re hurting me, we’re only hurting ourselves. I have escalated in that feeling, where now I’m even more sensitive to when there’s pain or something’s being destroyed. On the flip side, when there’s something joyous, I feel it. I hurt for Mother Earth. I know a lot of us and we have dear friends who are hurting for all the pain of others. That’s been very interesting because we’re all interconnected.

You can’t see the images on the news. You can’t pick up a newspaper and see the pain across the country whether it’s economic, medically with the pandemic, people dying from COVID, what’s happening in India and overseas.

How do you manage that?

People say, “I can’t even watch the news, it’s so upsetting. How do you do it sitting there?” It is but if we’re not aware of it, we can’t do anything to change it.

How I’m navigating that because I can’t get a lot of stimuli with that, it’s too much for me. I get overwhelmed and think, “I’m responsible for one human.” Imagine if everyone on this planet took the best care of themselves. When I say the best care, that doesn’t mean that they hoard the most money or get the most. There’s plenty for all of us. If we all were centered in calm self and showed up from that place of wholeness, calm, centered and whole then we’re able to connect with one another without being like, “I’m jealous of you. I don’t like you. I project my junk on you.” Projection is a whole another conversation that drives me crazy because what you put out is what you see in the situation and what you attract.

It’s almost like that self-fulfilling prophecy.

What did they say? You get what you deserve or you attract what you believe. For me, I try to find joy and the lesson in the situation so I am seeing the good in that, maybe not so good situation. I try to learn from it and that’s what’s reflecting to me. That’s what I’m absorbing, the joy instead of the pain and it’s emanating out that positivity where if I sit in a negative spot and I’m like, “This sucks. This is terrible. This is horrible.” It is.

Who wants to be around somebody like that? You’re not going to attract other good people.

You’re going to track more of that because that’s what you see and put out.

Many lessons here are about focusing on controlling how you react to a situation, not to the situation. I learned. Here’s the thing I related to, I can’t control what’s going to happen during my newscast. A mistake might happen, words might be wrong. I can’t control that but I can control how I react to it. If I get angry when something goes wrong during a newscast, it’s going to project out and viewers are going to know. You have to say, “It’s live TV. You have to embrace the person who made the mistake because it’s all a collaboration.” How convenient we’re at the Collaboratory.

Speaking of being at the Collaboratory, when I was driving here, the darkest sky was behind it and I’m watching it come towards, I’m like, “I hope I get inside before this onslaught of rain comes,” which I did. I thought, “This is truly going to mess things up. Here we go. It’s going to rain. It’s going to be awful and the sky is going to open up.” I immediately went into, “Whatever’s meant to be, will be. Whoever’s supposed to come to be in the community will be here.” It didn’t end up happening but even if it had, I don’t control the weather. I control my reaction to the fact that it’s raining and it’s ruining things according to me. Why waste energy? Why be stressed out? That sounds ridiculous. Who would ever do that? We do that and we get like, “That guy cut me off.” Road rage.

You don’t have a chance to think sometimes, you just react to things. Even with my kids, I react to them and I was like, “Why did I do that?” After.

Let’s put into the space how you get better at not reacting and feeling the emotions. That bubbles up where you’re mad at the car, the rain and the kid for that experience, you still are allowed and need to feel that. How do you learn to work through that so that you cannot even experience it anymore? This goes back to what I was saying before about when I answered this for Heather Christie, she’s like, “That’s it? You breathe. Take a deep whole breath, you practice taking deep whole breaths. You practice being relaxed, chill out.”

Do not waste your energy being stressed about things you cannot control.

I love that you’re saying this because years ago, I was so mad at my daughter and yelling at her for something she did. It stopped in my tracks. She’s like, “Take a breath, mom. You always tell me to count to ten.”

From the mouth of babies. What did we do here before we came on to be with our friends? We took a minute and a half and we were taking breaths together. What was the second thing we were doing or I was expressing?


We took a minute and a half to be in this present moment to take some deep breaths together. I express my gratitude for this moment, for my friends, for the opportunity to get the conduit of whatever needs to be in this space. It’s from that place of being. Step number one, just be.

I was thinking to myself when we were saying this, every time I’m at a wonderful Memorial Day weekend with my husband and some friends or if I’m at a wonderful party, I want to set an alarm for myself, have it go off and remind myself to sit here and to look around. I’ll take it in and say, “This is amazing.” How many times afterward, you look back and say, “I don’t even remember.”

Here’s another one that we can do. David and I did this, to work up that muscle so that this becomes a habit. We did a 21-day gratitude practice, three things. Every night when we get into bed, I would be, “Three things.” There are some nights where you’re like, “Seriously?” What happened was on some nights, they were like, “Your rice and bean dish was delicious,” which it was. Sometimes it was like, “We got to spend time with Brendan and Meghan. It was so joyous and I’m grateful for our family.” Stuff like that.

Nine times out of ten, it was a simple moment that you probably wouldn’t even recognize before.

You gave me chills because you know what that’s about. This is a big one. It was always when I got there, I would be happy. If I had this title, this much money and this house.

Social media does that. You see everyone else’s pictures. I’m thinking, “If they’re taking a picture and sharing it but they’re not in the moment.” They’re not being, they’re Instagramming.

Think about that thing that couldn’t wait to achieve or do and you got there. All of a sudden there was another thing. Did that work? No, or it did for that split second of whatever that is. Imagine if you could be here, happy and wholly satiated. It’s not about where you’re going, it’s about all of the steps taking you there. You cast that vision, you enjoy that you have a goal. “I would love a new book.” Am I like, “I’m not going to be happy or whole. I’m going to contemplate that. Maybe work on that. I’m going to go for it.” It’s every step along the way. More importantly, this opportunity to now be out on my own and create my own community and company where I can be loved and help each other.

Steph talks to me about the fears you had from stepping away from the weekly paycheck, the benefits and the comfort because we all get stuck and say, “I can’t do that because this is safe.”

Hardest. I applaud my amazing husband who took this leap with me. He was like, “You want to change, don’t you?” I was like, “I do.” I lost people trying to work on wellbeing and healthcare. I had hit a wall and I saw other things that were much more important to me that I was not in alignment with my company. It wasn’t like, “You’re all jerks, I’m out of here.” It was literally like, “Thank you so much. These ten years have been amazing.” I’m passionate now about helping others. That was a chapter and I loved every second of it.

What’s the company? What’s the new journey?

FSW 1 Kellie Burns | Optimal Wellbeing

Optimal Wellbeing: If everyone centered in calm showed up from a place of wholeness, all people would be able to connect with one another.

I love this honesty, I’m still self-discovering that. This is a perfect way for us to close this conversation. I don’t know yet. Every day that I wake up, it’s a new discovery. It’s not about when I have this many clients or this much money. This is literally about me being in awe and wonder every day of the blessings that are showing up within my new company as I learn what is unfolding. I’m going to be happy every single step of the day, even though I could tell you all the things that aren’t here yet, all the things I want to see and all the ways I want it to look and feel.

This has flown by. I’m going to say it again, ChristinCollins.com. You can go into her website and you can find a new and improved website. There’s a YouTube channel. Sometimes your Friday email will pop into my inbox. I take a minute and I read it. It’s like going to church on Sunday and hearing the sermon. It helps you look forward to the week or the weekend. There are opportunities. A podcast is coming.

This will be the first one. Thank you. I will be in your seat. Connecting with some people that have helped stir or sparked something inside of me as I’m on my journey to optimal wellbeing. I welcome anyone into the community and you can go on the website. It’s ChristinCollins.com. It will be reemerging with a new look and feel. From there, you can get inspiration, little tidbits and experts. I’m so blessed to walk with this.

You brought in national speakers and some of the global speakers. This is a great opportunity to reset and to say, “Just be.”

You and I will be that first show.

I read it on a weekend and it was a touching weekend, it was Mother’s Day. I was with my family on the beach, it made me look up at the sunset and the beauty of the beach and say, “Be in this moment, appreciate the gratitude around me and love this moment.” Not think about what I have to do Monday or the next week. Thank you for that weekend. It’s a wonderful read and it’s inspiring seeing it. It will make you think about your life as well.

I want to end by thanking you. When this started happening, when I was in the moment and this started to emerge, I immediately thought I would love to take the opportunity for the first time to reflect on whatever has happened to see how this feels and what is the message. Most importantly, I want to express gratitude to all of you who have inspired this in me, fueled me and have helped to spark my awakening. Thank you so much.

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About Kellie Burns

Kellie Burns anchors NBC2 News at 5:00, News at 5:30 and News at 6. She started at NBC2 in 1994 as a reporter, working her way up to Collier County Bureau Chief, weekend anchor and finally primary anchor in 1996. Originally from upstate New York, Kellie graduated from the State University of New York at Geneseo with a bachelor’s degree in both Communications and Political Science, and a minor in International Relations. Her television career began at the age of nine as an anchor on an award-winning children’s show, “Action News For Kids” in her hometown of Binghamton, New York. Kellie’s award-winning career includes two Regional Edward R. Murrow Awards and several awards from the Florida Associated Press. In 2011, she took first place in the Hard News Feature category for her coverage in Haiti after the 2010 earthquake.

Kellie spends numerous hours helping non-profits in Southwest Florida raise money. She regularly hosts the Neighborhood Health Clinic Gala, the Lee-Collier County Heart Ball, Magic Under the Mangroves for the Conservancy of Southwest Florida, the Southwest Florida Wine and Food Festival and “Night at the Nest” benefiting Florida Gulf Coast University Athletics. She serves on the executive board of Canterbury School, and Children’s Advocacy Center and Gulfshore Life Magazine’s Advisory Board. Kellie was recognized in “2010 Power Women in Lee County” by Florida Weekly Newspaper and named one of “Southwest Florida’s 47 Power Players for 2010” by Gulfshore Business Magazine.